Hero's Tribute

Hero at one of her favorite lakes on Friday

Today I made the agonizing decision to say goodbye to my much-loved Hero.  She has been my constant companion for more than 14 years.  She's been wild and fun, spunky and sassy, independent and aloof, but mostly she's been an incredible friend.

Hero was sick for only 3 days.  Despite her 14 years she was in great health with just some mild arthritis and moderate hearing loss.  She still wanted - I mean demanded- her daily walks.  She loved the trails and ponds in our neighborhood.  Lately, we've been hiking at Hemlock Bluffs Nature Preserve; it's got some steeper trails & I've been going there to get ready for the Gratitude Hike.

Just last weekend, at Hero's request, we were sprinting full throttle at a trail near my house. I could barely keep up with her.

Over the last week I noticed she wasn't as interested in her food.  Wednesday this week she didn't eat at all. By Thursday morning, I knew she was sick and took her to the Animal Hospital at Peak Plaza where the wonderful & compassionate veterinarian Dr. Lindsay Warner has cared for her.  Lots of tests later, a small but aggressive tumor was discovered on her heart.  They said it had probably only been there a couple weeks at most.  It was causing bleeding around her heart and it couldn't be removed.  At Hero's age, heart surgery was not something I was interested in anyway.

I was given the option to attempt to provide Hero some relief by draining some of the blood that had collected around her heart.  At most it would give me a little extra time to spoil her, but there was no cure.

The procedure worked and I am so incredibly grateful for these last couple days spent with Hero.  We had visits from family & friends.  Hero swam & relaxed at her favorite park where we used to hike around the lake for miles and miles.  She ate chicken and mini-powdered sugar donuts.  But mostly she was home, with me and Louie.  Right where she loved to be.

After going through it a million different ways in my head, one text from my dear aunt that said, "There is no wrong decision," a call from a friend this morning that helped me realize that this truly is the hardest thing I'll ever do, I looked into Hero's eyes and knew I had to let her go. 

I am sad, so sad to lose this friend who has been with me for longer than any other friend I've known.  But I am also grateful for so many things:

• She had 14 GREAT years and was only truly sick for a few days
• She got to spend her last nights at home in her own bed(s) (she has several around the house!)
• I was able to be with her all day on Thursday while she was tested, poked and drained
• I held and kissed her for her very last moments 

Also, without Hero, I wouldn't have Louie. It was Hero's wild ways that led me to bring another dog into our home. When Hero was about 6-7 years old, I finally decided I couldn't keep up with her and she needed a playmate she could REALLY wrestle with. After a couple years of on and off searching for the right 'fit', Louie came into our lives. It was 'like' at first sight (Hero may have loved him, but she'd never let it show). They bonded in their own way and enjoyed wrestling matches a lot in those first few years, and in later years have simply enjoyed each other's company.

Louie and Hero on Friday

Without Hero I am not sure I would have ever ventured into the woods or enjoyed the numerous parks, trails, hiking areas, lakes & ponds in our area.  Without Hero's insistence at walking no matter the weather, I may never have discovered the feeling I get when we take our walks and the beauty of being outside in all seasons.  I may not have accepted my invitation to the Gratitude Hike, because I never would have considered myself the mountain-hiking type before Hero!    

Hero's adventurous spirit is a part of me now and I intend to honor and remember her in ways that meant the most to us both:  Running, hiking, splashing in the lake, sitting on the porch, tipping my head into the breeze.

I also intend to carry her spirit with me on the Gratitude Hike.  It is Hero I'll be hiking for that day.

I have discovered this week that the heartache we feel is equal to the depth of the love we shared and I wouldn't have it any other way.